Gosh, I see that many months have passed since my last blog! It has been a dense time with elder care trips for my 87 year old mother and her 94 year old partner several hours away, several successful retreat deliveries and collaborations, yard, house and studio maintenance, and of course b & b guests to host. I met so many incredibly inspiring people this year, including all of my retreat registrants, (an investment specialist, a criminal lawyer, caregivers, writers, policy makers, ministers and more), plus a couple from Australia. She manages three animal shelter facilities and her husband, newly retired, was employed in finance within that same animal care institution. They were interested in how I manage things here with the animals I care for and were duly impressed. I’m pleased to say we will stay in touch to determine any potential opportunities for support.
One of my regular visitors, (I call him ‘Mr. Robin’), returned for his third year at Sky Story. His needs are few but he seems to enjoy the cat kibble under the step as well as the large dish of fresh water. Though he is cautious, the front step feline mascots show no interest in him and he goes about his business from one day to the next. For a few reasons, my own two indoor/outdoor felines have been trying on the ‘outdoor’ cat life this summer. Sometimes I wonder if Mr.Robin is a secretly a tiny cat in bird clothing…a ‘pretendian’ if you will!
Speaking of ‘pretendians’, I had a surprising situation arise this summer which caused me to pause and think deeply again about my place on Treaty Four Land, my ‘mixed race relationship’ (a term I don’t often use), and the need for increased awareness regarding moniyaw (white) privilege and unnecessary appropriation. Let me preface the little story experience I’m about to share with the admission that I too, have received harsh judgement for teaching a practice ‘appropriated’ from Eastern relatives – ie. Yoga. If you haven’t yet come across this worldwide discussion the past several years, there exists a strident discussion regarding who should be teaching Yoga and who should not. Suffice to say, this is a topic for another blog! What occurred this summer involves my business, and some of my practices which arise from the years of study/training and attendance I have undertaken with First Nation elders, ceremonialists and my life partner.
And so…I was scrolling my cell phone for work email one day when I spied an out of the ordinary subject line from a trusted colleague: “Congratulations! You’re a Successful Nominee for…” As I’m not much interested in pursuing awards, I didn’t think much of it and continued with my other work responsibilities. When I finally sat down to read the email you could have pushed me over with a feather. Not only had I been nominated amongst my colleagues for an award within one of my fields of business (tourism). I had been nominated for an indigenous category. Whah, whah?!
It was confusing to me because I’m so clear as to my non-entitlement within nehiyaw, indeed all indigenous accolades/awards. It’s just not on my radar and so I was posed with the conundrum of how I could sensitively acknowledge my nominators’ actions to select me, yet explain how and why it was wrong action to nominate me and for me to accept the award should I be be the successful nominee. My nomination was obviously undertaken without an understanding of why a white woman should not accept an indigenous award. Additionally, there was clearly a misunderstanding of my business as a joint venture with my indigenous partner – a knowledge keeper, cultural advisor and emerging elder, (whom I work with at times only upon conducting traditional protocol), instead of my true business model – a sole proprietorship owned and operated by me (the potential recipient of the award). After all of this sunk in, I realized that these layers would have to be explained, not only to the nominating colleagues but to the provincial awards coordinator so that my name could be withdrawn and a repeat of this scenario would not take place in future.
Pretendian status is something I’ve actively avoided over the sixteen years I’ve been with my life partner. I remember being on top of a nearby butte several years ago with my partner and a professional photographer friend.
Our goal was to shoot some footage of my partner for his website and promotional photos for his multitudinous speaking engagements. At one point my partner grabbed a blanket, asked me to stand facing the wind and had our photographer friend shoot me standing and squatting, wind blowing my long hair freely behind me, blanket wrapped around me (it happened to be of indigenous design and colors). The photo was stunning, truly. I’ve never had the courage to reveal it to anyone other than a close friend precisely because of my caution to never be misunderstood as a wannabe nor a pretendian. In addition to privacy and safety concerns, I’m also not much interested in promoting my own image so ‘selfies’ of me or me with my partner are rarely posted.
As a part time advisor for the province’s College of Law these past few years, my partner was expected to serve on a seminal Committee to develop an institutional policy which would provide solid guidance for how to avoid hiring ‘pretendians’. The policy would also serve to outline a protocol for addressing individuals already in place. For over a year the University’s Committee members met to examine all factors related to this very serious, sensitive, and seemingly prevalent occurrence across Canada. I could see that the discussions were certainly challenging and also wearing, to say the least.
Life is rarely black and white, but as a Tibetan Buddhist practitioner, I seek as much clarity as possible through a lens of ethics, compassion, awareness and wisdom based on reality. I love little surprises like Mr. Robin’s reappearance in the spring (knowing that it may or may not occur given myriad dangers and the fragility of our corporeal vessels). I also feel a strong sense of responsibility to all beings (neighbours, colleagues, locals, visitors, and those whom I will never meet) to discuss matters of import that can affect the quality of our lives, both in this realm and others. I invite my readers to do the same.
May all beings be well. Om ah hum.
Hiy hiy.
What is possible when we view the land as a relation? As a mother? Can we live in a way that allows us and the Earth to thrive? What kinds of connections and changes do we need to make and how are these changes possible given the increasing number and magnitude of world challenges?If you’re feeling the pull to creatively explore your place, purpose, decisions and relationship with the land through meaningful investigation please consider registering for our second Visions and Longings Retreat, August 7th (evening) to August 9th, 2026, or our fourth annual Cactus & Lotus Retreat, September 11 – 13, 2026! Gather with a small group of like-minded people who support each other on their weekend journey of discoveries. We’ll explore the land with intention and simple assignments, use meditation and humble, non-threatening materials to distill our experience, enjoy delicious food, laugh, cry, ponder, acquire personal insights for home practices, explore earth friendly actions and creatively nurture our inner landscapes. Visit skystory.ca/events for more information on either retreat. Early bird rates available!
Experience a Special Night Sky in Grasslands!
Call now to book your accommodation. November 15 -17, 2025 – Leonid Showers
Wicked Stories of the West!